&Follow SJoin OnSugar
Please join if you are a stepparent. I think if any others out there are like me; we could definately use some support. Stepchildren are wonderful gifts. I call them my kids that didn't require two weeks of labor!!! However, it is quite challenging. The second-guessing: am I favoring my own or am I favoring the stepkids to gain their love? Am I too hard or not hard enough? Pretty much all of the same issues you would have with biological children except stepchildren are not biologically wired to love and accept you like the ones we popped out. I would LOVE to hear your stories. I have two full-time stepsons and one biological son who is also the youngest. We have all known each other for three years and my husband and I got married last July. It's definately a circus! I think the easiest lesson I've learned so far is to always admit when I'm wrong. Whether it's to a 7 year-old or 13 year-old, I'm cool with apologizing for my screw ups. I just hope that someday when they're grown and in therapy they'll remember to mention my humble nature!!!!

Not just a step mom

Posted By Mrs Just a step mom on Jul 24, 2012 at 10:30PM

As it sits im a 36 yr old step mom of 4 children, foster mom of 1 and a step mom still to a previous step son from a past marriage. And also a mother to 1 deceased son.  But im more than that. I am a step child and an adopted child. I have a mother and father, adopted dad and a step dad. I am an only child but have 3 half sisters one half brother, two adopted brothers, step sister and two step brothers. And im sure if I could talk to my father id find out there were more. Now with all that I face a day to day struggle with people telling me im wrong! Im not a mother. That I need to go have a family of my own. I am called names daily, bashed, trashed talked, slandered and humiliated by my step childrens MOTHERS, my once friends, my IN LAWS and so many more. When did adults become so cruel? I am a good person. I open my home and my heart to all until proven that I need not to. I just dont get it anymore! My children no matter which one they are they love me, yet are forced to choose between me and their birth moms! Who does this? What gain is there torturing a child to choose? My parents did this and it was horrible. I watched my father forget I was even there, then my own mother walked out leaving me with a man who at most times made me feel like I was just an obligation. Soon after their divorce he got custody of me....I was broken! Two failed abusive marriages later and I found my other half. Yes he has 4 children from two different women. I accepted that. Treated them as my own. Loved them like my own. Yet im treated like an outcast by his family and friends. I recently took on the challenge of a 16 yr old foster child. Now im told im brown nosing the system to make it seem like im a good person! WHAT? Since last October I started a page on facebook, called "Just a Step Parent?", I have joined many Fathers Rights Groups, anything I can to help others in my situation or ones similar. Some days I find peace but most I cry myself to sleep wishing I had the answers. I have lived one hecka life been places, seen things....but the level of evils I have seen from more and more bio moms is astounding! Thank you for letting me share this, I truly needed a place to just talk even if no ones listening.